Monday, January 19, 2009

Sam Salesman

Age: 35
Height: 5'10"
Occupation: Dental Equipment Sales

I don't like to talk to my internet dates on the phone before we meet. I'm not sure why that is. Perhaps I'm afraid that we'll be on the phone with nothing to say to each other. I'm not a big fan of uncomfortable silences. I usually don't give an internet guy my phone number until the day we are scheduled to meet (in case something comes up and he has to cancel last minute or let me know he'll be late). I wasn't planning on giving Sam my number, but his e-mails were so chatty that I was sure there wouldn't be any uncomfortable silences. And there weren't.

We chatted like were old friends. Granted, we didn't have long phone conversations, just two or three to set up a meet for the weekend. Like his e-mails, our conversations were full of questions on his part. We joked around and exchanged friendly banter. I had a really good feeling about the coffee meet. In fact, the night before we met, he sent me a text, telling me to enjoy my sushi night with my friends. It was really thoughtful.

Sunday afternoon, he phoned me to confirm our plans. He teased me about my activities of that afternoon (trying to set up my DVR player and threatening to come find me if I knocked out cable in the Lower Mainland during that afternoon's football game) and we set up a meet at an eatery out his way. He had offered to come out to me, but nothing in my area is open late (i.e. past 7) on Sundays.

I was excited enough about the meeting that I even changed into something a little more feminine. I was planning on wearing my cozy "dress hoody" (made of a fuzzy cream fabric, not sweatshirt cotton, may I add!) and jeans with my favorite unisex-looking brown boots, but I opted for a dark teal turtleneck with flouncy sleeves and my new burgundy ballerina flats. Cute, right?

I arrived at the eatery first. I stood in line and waited as two women in front of me chatted with their friend who came late and was standing behind me. (Yes, I could've let their friend in front of me but the other two were taking so long, I opted not to.)

As I waited patiently for my turn, the door opened to my left and I looked behind me. It was him. He was scanning the room and when he got to me, I smiled and waved and said hello. He didn't smile. I mean, he probably did, but it certainly wasn't a smile that said, "Nice! Just like your picture."

He held out his hand and said, "Hi, I'm Sam." I shook it (good handshake) and introduced myself formally as well. He motioned that he was going to get a seat and I asked him if he would like anything to drink, so he joined me in the line instead. I caught him giving my coat a scan. What was that about?

Conversation lightened at that point. He asked me how the cable-laying went and joked that things must have gone well since he was able to finish the football game without interruption. I let him pay for my tea and we took a seat in two cushy chairs by the window. In hindsight, perhaps a small, intimate table would have been more conducive to a "getting-to-know-you" coffee, but when you have the opportunity to take the cushy chairs, you take them.

We chatted for a good two hours about everything - his family, my family, his job, my job, views on legalization of marijuana and prostitution, lost packages on eBay, broadway musicals. You name it, we talked about it. Conversation flowed really well and I was "on". I don't think I've allowed myself to be comfortable enough to be "on" for awhile. It seemed like we had a lot of similar interests and on paper, it was going really well, but I got a weird sense that the night wouldn't end in a hug and a sincere, "Let's do this again soon."

We walked out to the parking lot together. I said I was going to duck into Chapters for a bit and so he shook my hand again, told me to look for a book on cable installation while I was in there, and bid me adieu.

Tepid. Very tepid.